It happens to the best of us. The negotiation just hasn’t been going well. Our strategy is unraveling. The other side has dug in their heels and isn’t willing to cooperate with us on anything. Or maybe things were going great for a while, but suddenly we hit a barrier we can’t seem to get past.
What do we do when it seems like the deal is doomed? Here are five tips for breaking stalemates in negotiations that might help us save the day.
1. Assess the Danger
First things first: let’s take stock of what’s at risk here. How badly do we need this deal to work out? Fully and realistically evaluate the potential costs of a failed negotiation. What’s the value of the relationship? What does our organization stand to lose if we leave the table with no agreement? Are there any litigation risks? Understanding what we have at stake can help us decide whether it’s better to keep trying to reach an agreement now, or to drop it and find another solution. (Remember, we should always go in with a BATNA and WATNA in mind so we know what our options are.)
We should also consider what the risks are for the other party. If we can develop an understanding of their underlying interests and needs, we can form some idea of how important the agreement is to them. Asking questions or pointing out the potential costs of a failed negotiation may induce them to work with us to reach a win-win solution.
2. Examine the Wall
If we’ve made some progress but then hit a barrier to a final agreement, we need to look closely at what’s standing in our way. Is someone dug into a position they won’t budge from? Are both parties being forthcoming about their underlying interests? Is there a trust issue? Are the parties listening to each other? Are there assumptions in play that are creating a misunderstanding? Is the other side holding out for something we can’t provide, and are there any alternatives? Do we need to help the other party save face before they can agree? If we can’t make any more headway with the person we’re talking to, is it possible to work with someone else?
Get creative, and try different ways to approach the problem – considering new perspectives, breaking the issue down into pieces, or brainstorming with the other party.
3. Run Out the Clock
If we believe it’s in both parties’ best interests to get the deal closed and we don’t want to keep negotiating indefinitely, setting a deadline can be extremely helpful. Having a set end-point for the discussion helps motivate both parties to work together and get decisions made.
If no deadline was set at the start of the meeting, work with the other party to establish one. It’s not always ideal to make important decisions under time pressure, but it is likely to keep things moving. If both parties agree on a deadline it also helps foster a sense of cooperation as they work to beat the clock.
4. Keep a Cool Head
Getting well and truly stuck during a negotiation can be extremely frustrating. However, getting emotional or being impatient isn’t likely to help – especially if the other party seems to be actively trying to get under our skin. When we become emotional, our rational thought processes shut down, and decision-making becomes instinctive rather than thoughtful. We may shut down or lash out instead of continuing to speak constructively and listen effectively.
Working patiently with the other party to solve problems and explore potential solutions is a key to negotiating a win-win deal. Ask for a break if necessary when things get too stressful. Keep a cool head, stay calm, and separate the people from the problem. Don’t panic, don’t become hostile – and don’t give up.
5. Bring in a Mediator
If all else fails, sometimes bringing in a neutral third party can help us get over the hump. If the parties are unable to be completely open with one another, or if conflict has escalated to a point where problem-solving becomes impossible, a mediator can provide a zone of neutrality within which real progress can take place.
A mediator can help us overcome obstacles and work with each party to discover whether there is any overlap between their ZOPAs (Zones of Potential Agreement). A skilled mediator can also plan a negotiating process, smooth out communications, and suggest solutions that create more value for both parties.
Baker Communications offers leading edge Negotiations Training solutions that will help you address the goals and achieve the solutions addressed in this article. For more information about how your organization can achieve immediate and lasting behavior change that leads to bigger wins during negotiations in any setting, click here.
