Even in principled negotiations, situations sometimes arise that are daunting to the negotiator. You have your objectives, you have a plan, and you know what to do if they’re playing dirty… but what do you do if the other side asks a question you can’t answer? What happens if you make a proposal and they just sit there? How can you make a deal when the negotiation just doesn’t seem to be going anywhere?
Don’t panic. Keep your head and you can navigate any negotiating situation.
Whatever your level of expertise, sometimes you are going to run into a question in a negotiation that stumps you. If the other side asks you a question to which you don’t know the answer, it can be stressful.
Your inclination may be to sidestep the question, or try to bluff your way through it. You don’t want to look uninformed or ill-prepared. Your self-image as a savvy negotiator and subject matter expert is on the line!
Don’t panic. Believe it or not, the other side isn't really expecting you to know everything. Have the confidence to speak up when you don't know the answer.
In a principled negotiation, the best policy is honesty. Just say “I don’t know the answer to that; I’ll have to find out and get back to you.”
There is no shame in telling them straightforwardly that you need to have to check on something or do some research before you'll be able to answer their question. They don’t expect you to be omniscient!
Before you even go into a negotiation, you should know what you’re hoping to get from it. If you have planned properly, you will have a clear set of objectives that you want to accomplish, a number of concessions you want to ask for or are willing to make, and some idea of what the eventual agreement is likely to look like.
However, if you go in and start talking about what you want and why they should let you have it, and they don’t really respond – don’t argue, don’t agree, but don’t do much of anything – what do you do?
Don’t panic. If you reach the end of what you had to say and they don’t say anything back, just start repeating yourself. Go back over your key points. Find a different way to formulate your proposal and see if different wording elicits a response.
It’s actually possible that the other side may not have heard, or fully understood, what you said the first time. Just as in public speaking, where the rule is “tell them what you’re going to tell them, tell them, then tell them what you told them,” important information in negotiations bears repeating.
Even in principled negotiations, you can reach a deadlock, or slowly realize that you’ve been going over the same ground over and over, circling some point where you just can’t seem to reach an agreement. It may start to look like there’s no way to reach a deal.
Don’t panic. And don’t give up! Even if it seems like you’ve talked the issue to death, the best thing you can do to get past this sticking point is to keep talking.
The more you talk, coming at the problem from different angles, discussing more alternatives, the higher the likelihood that you will eventually find a way to reach a deal.
Part of conducting a principled negotiation is looking for mutually satisfactory solutions. If you keep talking, you may well uncover new information that you weren't previously aware of – an unmet need, a motivator, an alternative approach – that will allow you to reach an agreement.
As in anything else, the best way to ensure you can’t succeed is to stop trying. Only by continuing the negotiation can you discover a way to bridge the gap.
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